The Last Days, the EU and the Chops Louse

We hereby bring this extract from an exclusive lecture held by the well-known professor of theology, dr. T. Alkson Lynonsense during a new year conference in Oslo this year. Lynonsense is known for his many years of research on the chops louse and he is alsoa recognized expert on the last days. Lynonsense currently doesn't work at the University of Oslo, and he has several times been nominated for the Nobel pace prize.

All christians, and most other people in countries with a christian or catholic background have read about or heard of the beast in the Book of Revelation, and the EU debates during the recent years has revealed a great confusion on the topic. There is, however, reason to believe that the South African chops louse must be the beast, and I will now explain why.

The chops louse is a small, brown and hairy creature with characteristic chops, from which it's got its name. On the head, the chops louse has ten corneous outgrowths, which we can read about in Rev. 13:1: And I saw a beast rising up out of the sea, having seven heads and ten horns, and on his horns ten crowns, and on his heads a blasphemous name.

If we examine the greek text, we discover that the word horn is the greek keras, which is derived from a word actually meaning "a hair on the head". It is therefore obvious thet the outgrowths on the chops louse must be the ten horns mentioned in the above verse.

Further on, we read that the beast was rising up out of the sea. Knowing then, that the chops louse is the most important cause of seduction, which is spreading all over Europe, we get another argument. This seduction is caused by a parasite that lives on the chops louse. This parasite is not water-resistant, therefore, the chops louse must rise up out of the sea to avoid drowning the parasite.

The last argument is the mutations. Artificial food additives in EU countries make the chops louse mutate, and we get new, aggressive mutations which are very fertile. Today, we don't know any means of stopping this development, and we may clearly see the connection in Rev 13:4: "Who is like the beast? Who is able to make war with him?" We also know that there are seven main mutation classes, and most theologians interpret this as the seven heads mentioned in Rev 13:1. The blasphemous names will appear gradually as people fully feels the effect of the devastation from the chops louse mutations.

Last updated: 15/02/2001